Thursday, December 20, 2012

Visiting the goat farm and our first Shabbat in the country and male goats could be a cure for homosexuality

B'h

This morning we went to visit a lovely couple who run a goat farm and the lady goat person checked out my milking technique and see that I am milking my goat properly and not pinching her teats. Turns out I was handling the teats too high and that was not good. I have to use two fingers and it is also meant to help my arthritis. I was also raising the matter of a shidduch for my Osnat.
We visited the boys in the buck pen to check out who might be a suitable match for her. She is fine boned and quite delicate so I do not want a heavy boned buck. The boys are quite smelly. They love to pish over their own faces and other bucks too, so they are very strong smelling. They all came over to have a look at the visitors. Nir declined to go in. He was scared of the little goats who ran after him and started to suck on his trousers and shirt. It freaked him out. He will get used to them. They are just very tame and friendly. She also has a couple of Alpachas in the herd to stop the wild dogs attacking the kids and the young goats. I keep ours in the house yard at night and after hearing what she had to say about the wild dogs, I will keep Osnat or Ossi for short, locked up at night in the pen next to the chook house.
There were some beautiful boys there. A couple with horns that are too old to bud and the others are polls or hornless goats. They are so sweet. I like Osnat who does have horns but I will get her kid budded as it makes for easier handling and milking. Horns can be quite dangerous.
The boys got very excited and some of them might be close to rut which means that they are feeling kind of sexy. One of the must have smelt my doe goat on my clothes as I had milked her and had just come from my milking observation with Rhonda's female goat so he came at me with his tongue popping in and out of his mouth and making a funny wup wup noise. He got a smack on the snout which still didn't quite deter him. I think if I was breeding goats, I would go into the buck pen with a plastic raincoat on. When they are in rut, they try and pish on you too. Stinks like anything and you do not run the boys with the girls when you are milking goats, because the stench enters the milk.

Come to think about it, being around billy goats and stroking their heads and faces, could be a cure for male homosexuality. A male couple who feel attracted to each other could each roll in the billy goat pish or allow the goat to spray them on a daily basis. they would then give each other a wide berth for the day. Any time they feel close to sinning with each other, they allow the billy to spray them. That should calm things down. I guess it would take about twenty one days. both males would begin to associate the attraction to a person of the same sex with billy goat pish and a bbbadddd, bbaddd smell. Then you take them to a luxuriously furnished room with a wonderful perfume wafting through the room and show them pictures of females who are appropriately clothed and nice looking girls. Every time you show a picture of a woman you make them eat a chocolate or a favourite food choice. You also must make an education program that will restore their sexual balance. So bad smells are associated with same sex attraction, good food, peaceful music and positive things.
I think there are a lot of people out there who see themselves as homosexual and they are simply conned into being gay by the bully boys and girls of the gay community and these people feel they have no choice,
Let's go and prepare for shabbat. It is a great day and I am looking forward to my first country shabbes. Pity we do not have guests. However it will happen.
Shabbat shalom and I want to get a bit more insight into Vayegash.

9 comments:

Graham Douglas-Meyer said...

What a vile and perverted person you are.

Your twisted sense of self-righteousness is offensive in the least and outright disgusting for any sane person.

You need to deal with your own perversions before you start accusing Gay men of being perverts.

Adding Shabbat Shalom at the end only serves to show that you have little or no regard for God or the Torah.

Ilana Leeds said...

B"h
Grow up. The only one who is a pervert is you. My perversions? Don't make me laugh even more. Since when is reading and writing (and NOT smut, I might add), bush walking and yoga and growing fruit trees and raising goats and chickens perverted? Your type I would want to keep away from my goats and chickens, because you would not be able to control yourself and you would interfere with them probably. Definitely keep you away from my child, you evil, vicious animal.

Ilana Leeds said...

B"H
I have a lot of respect for Torah and keep to Torah guidelines. You need to study Torah daily for at least two hours a day to desanitise

Ilana Leeds said...

B'H

Interesting! Just checked out the person who calls me a 'pervert'. I have to laugh. This Graham Douglas-Meyer (doncha jest luv the double banger name?) is a so called gay 'christian' (I always thought Christians were similar to us and were not in favour of homosexual mating behaviour. He is obviously not aware that the Torah states categorically 'for a man to lie with another man as he would with a woman is an abomination'. States quite clearly. The same way you will never have kosher pig meat, you will never have a kosher homosexual. So let's call a spade a spade, shall we not?
You want to be gay, be gay, but do not call yourself an observant Jew or Christian or anyone who follows Torah law.
You call me a pervert? Are you some kind of moron? for your information, I am not gay, lesbian or other perverse sexuality. I am a fully resolute, clear thinking female of nearly sixty who is celibate by choice and religious conviction because I believe that one should have the sanctity of a marriage ceremony before co-habitation with a member of the opposite sex.
Yes, I like many of us lived a pretty free and easy life once, but I will tell you that I did not cheat on my partners ever and NEVER betrayed the sanctity of my marriage vows. I cannot say the same for some gays who would never be able to remain faithful to one man or woman. I could see that quite clearly from the gays who used to hang out at Monash University during my uni days. Sad lot of people, really.
You make a mockery of the marriage ceremony by your so called marriage to another man. It is also not legal in Australia.
You dare call me a pervert, you sicko. Go wash your mouth out with soap and water.

Booligirl said...

Hey, Graham,

Welcome to Ilana World!

A quick u-turn is advised.

Good luck,
Booligirl :)

Ilana Leeds said...

B'H
And you must be just as nutty as he is? What are you Booligirl? Another full on perverted lesbian out to corrupt the world with "PC" speak and another of the 'same sex marriage' nutter band waggon.
Your lot are quite disgusting. Are you a school teacher too out to 'normalise same sex marriage' with programs to confuse and confound the normal hetrosexual kids and make them think there is 'something wrong with them, because they do not subscribe to the lesbian or gay way of life?'
You are dangerous and someday the world will wake up and then watch out. There always have been gay or homosexual people around who have lived quite good and normal lives except for their sexuality. They did not bother people and people did not bother them. No one talked about them but we all knew something was not 100% straight. Now we have the gay brigade banging drums and trying to 'normalise the abnormal' and that is what I have (and many others)have an issue with.
Then the Graham person tries to tell me I am a pervert. (LOL) He must be on some funny sort of drugs for whatever. Sick and sicker. You people are very sick, very very sick and you are trying to take over the Departments of Education to push your ugly perverse agendas.

Dan said...

you say your not a pervert, yet your considering making people roll around in goat feces? seems a little perverse to me, if you resort to the original definition of perverse. (I'd just like to add that I'm a perfectly comfortable heterosexual gentleman, before you go off on another homophobic rant against my perverse lifestyle)

Ilana Leeds said...

LOL. It's not feces but pish and my comment was tongue in cheek. Some of the comments here are beyond ridiculous but well, I get a daily laugh.
By the way Dan, capitals at the beginning of a sentence is a good idea, and your post should be written thus:
"You say you're not a pervert, yet you ask others to consider rolling in goat feces? That seems a little perverse to me, if you resort to the original definition of perverse. (I'd just like to add, I am a perfectly comfortable heterosexual gentleman, before you go off on another homophobic rant against my 'perverse' lifestyle."
See now that is improved, isn't it?
By the way, Dan, even if you were homosexual, that is your business and we can have a perfectly calm and productive working environment and even friendship relationship, so long as you don't try to make me feel guilty because I am heterosexual and do not support gay marriage or try to shove your lifestyle down my neck and say that is the better way to live.
You kind of jump to conclusions about me, don't you?
I bet you think I sit at my computer all day thinking, 'Now what can I write that will upset the gay and lesbian community?' I don't. Could not be bothered. I write about things that inspire me, I am passionate about and you in your 'unusual way' of viewing things may just mistake my intentions or directions here. I have a passion for goats at present and I am sure you will try with others to turn it into something else but that is more a statement about you and not about me or mine. Understood. Have a lovely day and laugh a little. It helps keep the wrinkles away and excercises a lot of hormones that are helpful to anti aging.

straightben said...

Perfect parody for "ex gay/reparative therapy". LOL. You perfectly captured the absurdity of it all!!!